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1. |
Cent Percent In Maya
01:22
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“I am just fine,”
that is what the foolish karmis say
when they are suffering all the time
In every conceivable way.
Birth, death, disease and going gray
What could possibly make you think that it’s OK?
It is Maya. Maya. Maya. You are too much in the maya. Maya!
You are so much puffed up
You think you are so very big
But all your nonsense activity
Is done much better by the pig. La la la.
I think you don’t like what I say
Who cares what you think? You are mudha anyway.
You are in Maya. Maya. Maya. Cent percent in maya. Maya!
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2. |
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You think you are cool, yeah. Simply chasing stool, yeah
I'm going to tell you all about the four rules yeah.
Way, way down inside, you need some purification.
I'm going to give you my realization
Give up every pinch of sense gratification. Whoa.
You are in Whole Lot of Maya. Whole Lot of Maya. Whole Lot of Maya.
You keep chewing what you were previously chewing.
All your precious human life you are misusing.
Way, way down inside, I think you have one screw loose
I'm going to give you one Bhagavatam
You're going to give me one donation uh-huh.
Hey! Haribol! Come back here now!
I want to give you one Back to Godhead. Hey!
You are in Whole Lot of Maya. Whole Lot of Maya. Whole Lot of Maya.
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3. |
Denial of Inevitable
01:24
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In the place where I come from
The filthy karmis, they watch TV
They do not plan for their next life
Simply wasting time in front of TV
They go to shopping mall, they go to restaurant
They go to football game, they go to Black Sea
Birth and death, old age and disease
That is all they get, but they don’t want to see
We all live in denial of inevitable, denial of inevitable, denial of inevitable
We all live in denial of inevitable, denial of inevitable, denial of inevitable
My old friends, they are all in maya
They do not chant any rounds. They all eat meat.
I call them up two times a year, to call them rascal
They don't like me.
We all live in denial of inevitable, denial of inevitable, denial of inevitable
We all live in denial of inevitable, denial of inevitable, denial of inevitable
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4. |
Karmi Grains
02:14
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Prabhupada did not want eating in restaurant Karmi Grains
Karmis are lusty and rude. Guess what goes into your food? Karmi Grains
Unbelievably muchi. They even smoochy the poochy! Karmi Grains
I do not lie I tell you why we do not buy Karmi Grains
Organic vegan nachos made by mleccha picking nose Karmi Grains
They do not like to take bath. I will let you do the math. Karmi grains.
You cannot offer to Lord better to eat cardboard Karmi Grains
I tell you why we do not buy I do not lie Karmi Grains
So if you want to be wicked, Cap'n Crunch is the ticket Karmi Grains
And if you want to go nuts, there's always Dunkin Donuts Karmi Grains.
But I would not even risk it! Not even one little biscuit. Karmi Grains.
I do not lie I tell you why we do not buy Karmi Grains.
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5. |
Bhagavatam Classes
01:02
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When you wake up in the morning in your filthy muchi bed
with some low-class rascal hoodlum sound vibration in your head
some so called music meant for nincompoops and asses
why dont’ you listen to Bhagavatam classes?
Oh yeah. Oh yeah. Oh yeah. Oh yeah.
So, go out and get yourself one big, fat iPod
with so many gigabytes everyone will say, “Oh, my God”
Don’t fill it up with silly songs by bearded men with cheap sunglasses
You should be downloading Bhagavatam classes.
Oh yeah. Oh yeah. Oh yeah. Oh yeah.
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6. |
Maya.com
01:35
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I met them in a bar in my old hometown
They were selling B.T.G, I was guzzling down Stolichnaya
Sto-Sto-Stolichnaya
They walked up to me and they asked me to chant,
They will give me magazine but if I can't I am in Maya
Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Maya, Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Maya . . .
Well I left home and joined Samkirtan party
I am offering the bhoga and singing for the arati
My crazy karmi friends told me I was insane
I said, "what do you know? You have cow dung for the brain."
I am not pure devotee, I am not so advanced
But as long as I am keeping it in my pants, I am not in Maya
Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Maya
Cats will be cats and dogs will be dogs
I am writing all about it now in online blog – I call it "Maya"
M.A.Y.A. Maya (dot com) Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma-Maya
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7. |
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We will chant on the street,
Get in back, don't talk back. We're going downtown.
Chant on the street, whoa yeah.
We have burfi sweet to give out to all fallen rascal.
We will eat them ourselves. Oh, yeah.
Harinam. Bang a gong. Sankirtan.
Bang a gong. Harinam. Sankirtan.
We have non-leather shoes because we choose to shop at Payless.
Non-leather shoes, oh yes.
We will jump up and down we will pound the non-leather mrdanga.
We are non-violent movement, yeah.
Harinam. Bang a gong. Sankirtan.
Bang a gong. Harinam. Sankirtan.
We will dance in the way of pedestrian going for fast food.
Get in his way, oh yes.
If policeman says go away we will simply blow conchshell.
Shatter his heart, oh yes.
Harinam. Bang a gong. Sankirtan.
Bang a gong. Harinam. Sankirtan.
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8. |
Big Maya Today
02:12
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Big Maya Today. Big Maya today.
When you go for sense gratification you know you are in big maya today.
I had one friend. Very nice brahmachari.
I told him that he should stay that way or else he would be sorry.
He did not listen. Now he has one wife.
He is like animal in captivity with ball and chain doing twenty-five to life.
Big Maya Today, Big Maya today.
When you go for sense gratification you know you are in big maya today.
One new devotee, he goes suffering on Internet
He bought computer for the preaching but he has not done yet.
I said, “Bhakta Boris, you should live in fear.
You are watching videos of kitten you will end up like Bharata Maharaja and the deer.”
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9. |
Filthy Karmi
01:55
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Karmi, you are rascal, gratifying senses, thinking you will be very happy someday
but you get no higher taste sending Sputnik into space
thinking too much highly of your own birthplace
Filthy, filthy karmi. Filthy, filthy karmi.
Karmi you are mudha, lowest of the mankind,
all of your intelligence is stolen away
your life is simply waste - eating, sleeping, sucking face
breaking regulative principles all over the place
Filthy, filthy karmi. Filthy, filthy karmi.
Karmi you are suffering threefold misery.
Don’t you know that you will be dead someday?
You are running rat race at the breakneck pace.
why don’t you simply do what Srila Prabhupada says?
Filthy, filthy karmi. Filthy, filthy karmi.
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10. |
We Are Devotee
02:07
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I am paying my dues, out on Samkirtana.
I used to do so much very bad nonsense. Those days are gone now.
and very bad mistake, I have made almost two:
I forgot to ask if there were eggs in that cake but now I always do!
We are devotee, my friend.
And we will wear dhoti again and again.
We are devotee, we are devotee.
No time for the maya, because we are devotee
of the Lord.
I have taken my vows. I have my spiritual name.
I’ve given up meat-eating, illicit sex, intoxication and gambling.
Why don’t you do the same?
You could stay very high always, never have to come down.
But instead you keep listening to Queen cassette tape when you think no one is around!
We are devotee, my friend.
And we will eat rice, dal, roti, as much as we can.
We are devotee, we are devotee.
No time for the Maya, because we are devotee.
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11. |
Sense Gratification
01:35
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It is simply waste of time
Trying to please the senses and the mind
You get no relief, they give you no vacation
I’m talking about sense gratification
Sense gratification. Sense gratification, baby!
Part Two: (because it is not “all one.” That is not our philosophy.)
Why don’t you all chant sixteen rounds?
Instead of like monkey jumping up and down?
You say it is all evolution and there is no creation
I’m talking about mental speculation.
Mental speculation. mental speculation, baby.
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12. |
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you cannot get any satisfaction
if you have way too many sinful reactions
but you try and you cry then you die don't you know why
you cannot get any, you cannot get any
You have got this human form
but you do not know what it is for
simply implicated more and more
in so many painful situations
resulting from attempted sense gratification
you cannot get any any any any .. hey hey hey that is what I am saying
You are watching your TV,
full of filthy karmi “situation comedy”
you do not worship Lord Hari
simply anaesthetizing and exercising
your vegetable propensity
you cannot get any any any any .. hey hey hey that is what I am saying
you cannot get any satisfaction
because you are too much in the mode of passion
but you try and you cry then you die don't you know why
you cannot get any, you cannot get any
Your senses they are out of control,
sniffing this and eating that
but you have no ultimate goal,
simply eat sleep defend and that other nasty thing
you refuse to even cook with hing. you cannot get any. You cannot get any.
If you are walking down any street
there is illicit sex, intoxication, eating meat
there is cinema show, gambling casino
they are not worshiping the Lotus Feet
you cannot get any any any any .. hey hey hey that is what I am saying
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13. |
You Are Going To Die
01:42
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Well you can tell by the way I restrain my semen
I am brahmachari, no time for women
Society, friendship and love
Will not help you when your time is up
You say you're all right, you are OK
The mudhas always talk that way
But you do not know
When you will be dead
One piano could fall on your head
Whether you are Brahma or the President Obama
You are going to die, going to die
Time is going to crush you into little bits of dust
And you are going to die, going to die
Ha ha ha ha going to die going to die
Ha ha ha ha going to die ay yay yay ay yay yay yay yes!
I don't know why you try to sense gratify
When the fact is that you are going to die
You may DO exercise in fancy shoes, but
race against time you must lose
You think you are all right you are OK
But the threefold misery is here to stay
So you put your head
Into the sand
Let maya kick on other end
Whether you are Brahma or the President Obama
You are going to die, going to die
Time is going to crush you into little bits of dust
And you are going to die, going to die
Ha ha ha ha going to die going to die
Ha ha ha ha going to die ay yay yay ay yay yay yay yes!
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14. |
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All right, pay attention:
Here is how to stop acting crazy.
Chant sixteen rounds, follow all the four rules.
Think yourself lower than the worm in the stool.
Give up all your filthy material desire,
Unless you plan to stay in Maya
Unless you plan to stay in Maya – unless you plan
Unless you plan to stay in Maya – that is not very good plan
Unless you plan to stay in Maya – you should make different plan
Unless you plan to stay in Maya
Any question so far?
Mataji, please take the child outside. . .
You mistakenly think you are enjoying today and
You will chant when you are old and grey
Get serious now—you don't know when you will expire
Unless you plan to stay in Maya – unless you plan
Unless you plan to stay in Maya – that is not very good plan
Unless you plan to stay in Maya – you should make different plan
Unless you plan to stay in Maya.
You should move into the temple
Follow Yama Niyama dasa Brahmacari example
Give up your girlfriend and bank account
Wait! Why are you going now?
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15. |
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Devotee cooked Prasad for one county fair.
The hogs, dogs, and asses they all like to go there.
They all stood around saying, "What is this?"
You should have seen them taste it they were rolling in the bliss,
So take Prasad.
Everyone take Prasad.
Come on, get the mercy of God.
Rascal come and take Prasad.
They threw away the burger and the chicken leg bone
and the rib rack looking like the flesh xylophone
They pitched the karmi pizza and the lousy fish sticks.
They want to taste the nectar of Lord Krishna's lips.
So take Prasad.
Everyone take Prasad.
Come on, get the mercy of God.
Rascal come and take Prasad.
The subji was so tasty they were chewing on the spoon
and the cauliflower pakora it was putting them in swoon.
They were so intoxicated from the sweet rice and the kheer,
they forgot to drink their awful, stinking, muchi Lite beer.
So take Prasad.
Everyone take Prasad.
Come on, get the mercy of God.
Rascal come and take Prasad.
Rascal come and take Prasad. Rascal come and take Prasad. Rascal come and take Prasad.
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16. |
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She was just a new bhaktin
You know what I do mean
And the way she looked was more than you could bear
You could not see her as mother, no.
When you saw her chanting there.
Then she looked at you
And what you did not do
Was to run very far, very fast away from there
You could not see her as mother, no
When you saw her chanting there
Well your heart it went boom
When she crossed the temple room
You should have simply closed both eyes.
Now your dhotis they are all white
Which is a most depressing sight
And before too long, you will be fallen beyond repair.
You could not see her as mother, no.
When you saw her chanting there.
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17. |
Maya's Way
02:48
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And now, the end is near.
It is always near. In case you forgot that.
You think you can be happy here,
in material body. But you are not that.
You could live in spiritual world. Full knowledge and bliss,
where everything is OK.
But no, you don't want that.
You want to do things Maya's way.
Regrets – you will have more and more,
and more and more, as time progresses.
You will pray, like the karmis all pray,
"Lord, please clean up all my disgusting messes."
And Lord is so kind, even to rascal like you.
Just one holy name can save you right away.
But no, you are much smarter than that.
You want to do things Maya's way.
And what have you got? One hundred years, max,
even if you do yoga, and eat plenty of flax.
You may be Brahma, or insignificant ant.
You want to be God, but you simply can't.
The record shows, life very much blows,
when you do it maya's way.
The record shows, life very much blows,
when you do it maya's way.
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18. |
Pure Devotional Service
02:21
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pure devotional service, pure devotional service.
you come to the temple with the muchi long hairs
get rid of that then learn these prayers
early in the morning take ice-cold shower
offer to Lord one very nice flower
sit down listen to my Bhagwatam class
talk about hog, dog, camel, and ass
don't speculate, just try to understand
Supreme Lord is not ordinary man. No He isn’t.
Pure devotional service. Pure devotional service.
go downtown for the sankirtana
make them take book even if they don't wanna
back to temple for Gaura arotika
read about bifurcating Bakasura beak
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19. |
You Have One Friend
03:39
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You are suffering, in material energy, and you need one helping hand.
And nothing, no, no, nothing is going your way. Hey hey hey.
That is to be expected, because you are simply rascal.
But listen now, listen to what I am saying:
If you call the Krishna name, then you know, wherever He is . . .
(actually He is all-pervading, in every atom, He is Paramatma. .everywhere. . . )
. .He will come running, yeah yeah. . .
(or, He may come on back of Garuda, or walking, or however He likes. He is Supreme Lord. . .)
. . .To see you again, now. . .
(Lord is ALWAYS seeing; you are the one with vision problem. .)
Never mind how low you have fallen, no, no
All you have to do is call, and
He will be there. .
(He is already there. .)
You have one Friend.
La la la la.
If the sky above you should rain down blood, pus, stool and bones
And headless trunks of bodies are falling all around, now now now.
That is very hellish weather. Better you should stay at home.
Don't go out until you have chant more rounds, hey now.
If you call the Krishna name, then you know wherever He is. .
He is all-pervading, yeah yeah
I'll explain it again (I think maybe you were sleeping the first time. . .)
Never mind how low you have fallen, no no no
All you have to do is call, and
He will be there (He is always there. . )
You have one Friend. La la la la
Suhridam sarva bhutanam, yeah yeah yeah yeah
Bhakto 'is me sakha ceti, hey now
You have one Friend.
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Yama Niyama Dasa Brahmachari
Yama Niyama Dasa Brahmachari is insignificant servant of devotees of Lord. Our humble mission: to remind everyone that human life is meant for the spiritual pursuit. Other pursuit is simply for the animal. Oh, and we are all going to die even though soul is eternal, so no point in trying to so-called "enjoy" this world. YNDB came from very low-class background which he does not like to discuss. ... more
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